burrito year

my life is incredibly different now than it was one year ago today. I didn't know where I was going to be. But I know where I'll be on this day next year. 

I'll be in Los Angeles. I'll still be asleep after my long drive home. 
I will wake up and a sense of calm and excitement will sweep over me. 
I won't resent the year I left behind in Ashland. I learned a lot there. We had closure. I will reward myself with a burrito and come home and sit at my parents kitchen table and eat it. 

I can't not care. I have to care. Caring is who I am and that is not going to change no matter how many times you yell at me in public for it. 
I give people second chances, and third chances, and sixth chances. I give them chances until they truly don't deserve them anymore because I can only hope that there is something good in them. I have to believe that and I want to believe that. 

I can't just Eternal Sunshine someone out of my mind. 

When people come into my life they stay, unless they choose to leave. And that is how it will always be.