Men on leashes. part of part one.

its going to be a series of ten minute scenes. scenes between me and the various men in my life........
[every name except for mine will be changed.]

Bench next to a large flight of stairs, evening. The girl, has fallen ill. Boy comes to her aid. He has an overprotective, jealous girlfriend.

A: I’m thinking tea could help, its just a matter of getting you to stand up again.
S: Not…going to happen….
A: Come on. You should date him again.
S: …In sweatpants?
A: Yes in sweatpants. It shows humility. It shows you’re a real person. I’m in a sucessful relationship with Hannah, because of sweatpants.
Both: That’s a lie.
[they glance at each other and smile.]
S: he knows I’m a real person. We dated for four months. Maybe this is a stupid idea. And I have a fever. We don’t have to go.
A: Yes, yes we do. I want coffee. And if hes working and you’re with me he will give it to me for free.
S: ah ha, the truth comes out---
A: [interupting] AND I, well you know, want you to be happy and stuff. ALRIGHT. Time to stand up. I’m here.
[He helps her up with much resistance.]
A: You know, in all honesty being sick works for you. The husky voice, the phlemy laugh, its pretty attractive.
S: great.
[they begin to walk toward the stairs, his phone rings an embarrassing loud ring tone. Andrew freezes, looks at sarah and contiues to help her]
S: You can get that ya know, it may be important. It could be another friend that has free coffee already waiting for you.
A: I only like the free coffee I can use you for.
S: I bet you say that to all the girls.
[His phone persistantly rings again]
S: Just get it.
[while still holding on to sarah he takes out his phone that is in his pocket, once he sees that its his girlfriend he immediately drops sarah and races as far away as possible. Sarah stumbles and nearly falls, catching herself.]
A: Hey hannah, uh…no, yeah I’m just with Kevin, yeah and we uh are uh going to coffee bean. Oh hey we just walked in and Sarah is here! Woah, what are the odds!? HEY SARAH [sarah struggles in the background to remain standing] …..Yeah, I think Kevin and I are going to take these drinks to go, Sarah is meeting someone here…..okay, I will….hey Kevin, Hannah says hi…..oh he says whatup….okay, alright, I will, talk to you later. Okay, I love you, okay….okay….okay…..okay….alright…..okay, okay love you bye.
[Andrew runs back over to help sarah.]
S: I was unaware that my name was Kevin. I wish my parents had told me.
A: OH, the phone call? Oh that’s really no big deal she just… I dunno. She has trust issues. And knows that I wouldn’t hook up with Kevin.
[Silence]
A: I mean, really, if you think about it, it’s a compliment!
S: I don’t want to really think about it. It’s creepy. It’s stupid. She knows our relationship is platonic. She knows I don’t like you like that. Right?
A:….. well.
S: well what. Well….what?
A: I may or may not have told her about the time we almost dated.
S: ALMOST. ALMOST. Seriously? The world is full of almosts and maybes and you choose to tell your possessive, jealous girlfriend about this ALMOST?
[she sits from the weight of this information and puts her face in her hands]
S: this explains a lot.