that takes....

last night was "that takes ovaries" a open-mic benefit for The V-Day Campaign. I watched a few of my best friends here with pride as they sang and read personal poetry. For one in particular my heart filled as I watched her, very boldly reading a piece.
I wanted to sing but I still don't know if I can just go up and do that. That would take balls, not ovaries.
Instead, in order to promote The Vagina Monologues that are coming up in less than two weeks [yikes!] I wrote my own little vagina monologue. Since it was about me I assumed it would be harder, but, then again, the vagina monologue I have in the show is very close to home too so it was good practice.

Here is the piece I read:

I’m not someone who talks about my vagina. In fact, I very consciously don’t talk about it. Its part of me, whatever, but I never let it define me.

Recently I’ve begun to consider my vagina. Considering what it would wear and say. It would wear moccasins and a cape. The kind of moccasins that have been worn in and are now comfortable and the kind of cape you make from a sheet when you’re five. It would jump around on couches and pretend to fly around the room. On days when it felt sassy it would wear something see-through, see-through underwear, probably red lipstick. It would not talk about important matters at hand and instead say something sarcastic or a sentence that started with “duuuuude” or “what’s good?” Maybe one that ended with “fo sho!” It wants to make forts and lay in them all day with someone else. The funny part about that is, it hasn’t wanted to do that in a long time. Before it wanted to be irrational, stupid, fail a lot. It thrived on mocking itself. It craved the wrong kind of attention. It was moody, complacent and bored. Now, it just wants a decent conversation. Someone else to initiate. It wants to be tempted and perhaps even… romanced? ‘Romance’ is a strong word, a scary, cool word it isn’t familiar with. It wants to read a lot and be able to not have to impress anyone while still being impressive. It wants to say what it means, and what it doesn’t mean and would never mean. It needs to laugh; it needs to laugh a lot. But mainly it wants someone to make a fort with.

***side note, it may have found someone to make forts with. we'll see. the jury's still out.