Saturday, July 17, 2010

letters again.

[I did this awhile back. wrote letters to the people who significantly effect me. been thinking about this a lot. I have things to say but never have the opportunity to say them so, hear it goes.....]

one: I do not know everything, by any means. However, I do feel as though at some point you will look back on all of this and wish you had spent this part of your life differently. All I can see in you now is mockery and a different person. Its awful. It makes me far more sad then I let on.

two: I want you to be able to tell me things as frank as I can tell you things. After all this time sometimes I still feel like you are guarded. At the same time, I only feel like this sometimes. What will I do without you?

three: Its beyond wonderful to have you back in my life. Am I a jerk for saying that? I'm totally a jerk for saying that. But its true. The words that you choose everyday: beautiful.

four: You could do better. I see a lot of me in you. Circa sophomore year. But, you've been there for while. I'm worried how you'll feel when you grow up.

five: Its because you're peter pan. that's why I enjoy you. Regardless, I'm planning on being friends with you for awhile and I have a sneaking suspicion that you'll be there.

six: Enjoy yourself. Be happy on your own. Your co-dependence makes my skin crawl and my stomach churn. Goddammit. What the fuck happened?

seven: remember me? I'm here at your convenience. Its your choice though. I've decided. Since I'm second string to you, you've become second string to me.

eight: Its so strange. There are moments when I feel like it could be something more. But you're a sheep. I don't know how to depend on a sheep.

nine: I have nothing to say to you because you are the only person I can say everything to. You're the only person I like holding hands with.


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